How can you help your child with fears like these?Ignoring or belittling their fears is not going to help kids overcome these fears. For kids, these are very real fears that need to be addressed and taken care of. Monsters under the bed may be imaginary but laughing at them or tough love approach may not make them go away and you will have a child who is
scared but has no outlet to express themselves. However, giving in to their fears and appeasement is not going to help either. For instance, if a child is afraid of dogs, letting that fear be and keeping them out of all situations with dogs is not recommended either.
Let the love be unconditional – Withholding approval may seem like withholding love especially to growing kids. So the punishment for undesirable actions and praise for what we feel is desirable are both making the love conditional. They will look for praise or rewards in the case of positive reinforcement, and look to avoid unpleasantness in the case of punishment.
Instead of praise try description – Hey, I see you did your homework! Cleaned your plate! Or whatever they did is much better than effusive praise for doing what they must do to grow up well.
Embrace and accept your child – Each child is different. They grow at a different pace. They like and love different things. They have personalities of their own. Some bloom in the limelight and can perform nursery rhymes at the drop of a hat to an attentive audience, while others wilt under public glare and find it hard to get a word out. It does not make one smarter than the other. Accept your child for who they are in totality. Let them discover themselves.
How can you tell if your child is anxious?
Anxiety manifests itself in physical signs, emotional signs, and behavior.
Physical signs of anxiety can range from stomach aches, refusal to eat, refusal to sleep.
Emotional signs of anxiety are crying a lot, anger and temper tantrums, panic attacks, a constant need for reassurance, nightmares.
Behavioral symptoms of anxiety include fearfulness, reclusive behavior, long periods of unnatural quiet, approval-seeking and attention-seeking, refusal to go to school or daycare, lack of confidence, tantrums.